What's in a name?

My name is a tool that helps describe who I am, though it does not define me. I am much more than a name I was given at birth. A name is a first thing you learn about someone new. It serves as an introduction to a stranger and allows people to make their first judgements about you, this can be taken as a positive or a negative. My first name, Rachel, was chosen because it is a biblical name. Although neither my parents nor I are that religious, it was very important to them that their children's names were found in the bible. (My brothers name is Joshua.) Rachel was the 20th most common name for girls born in 1999, and I am surrounded by Rachels everywhere I go. This is why I believe that my personality, on top of my last name is more defining of who I am. My middle name, Michaela, was chosen after my great grandmother, Minnie, who my mother was very lose with. I never met Minnie, but it is common in Jewish tradition to name a child after someone who has recently passed, but is bad luck to name a child after someone who is still alive. I do not have a lot of information about my last name, Cannon, other than the fact that it is of Irish decent. My mother is the youngest of three sisters and decided to keep her last name, Rose, to keep that portion of the family alive for at least one more generation. When I was about late elementary/middle school age, I decided that I would add "Rose" into my middle name making it "Michaela Rose." I told all my friends about this change and my current passport actually says "Rachel Michaela Rose Cannon." Now, the problem with this is that my birth certificate does not include the "Rose" and therefore, two forms of legal identification have different names for me... Because of this odd situation I think a name is not a reliable way to define someone, especially because I have never really been too fond of my set of names.*

Similarly to how Anna Quindlen states that she is two, I would agree that I am two. I act very differently around my friends and even at school with teachers, than I do at home with my family. At school and with friends, I tend to be more outgoing and say whatever comes to mind. In these situations I often use language that is "hip" and what all my friends are using, like some neologisms, but these are words adults like my parents might not understand. More recently, I started getting closer to my older brother and started showing more of my "friends" Rachel and less of my "family" Rachel. This overlapping of both my personalities has been difficult because it is sometimes difficult to determine where to draw the line. This is the same as with my parents. I have never been that open with them, like I am with my friends, and it feels very odd when a conversations edges closer to the realm of how I speak with friends. The situation becomes the most sticky when I am with friends and my parents at the same time. Another thing that differentiates between my two selves is my responsibilities as each. I have been in situations where a friend is in need of support of some sort but I also has responsibilities at home that cannot be pushed back. When this happens, I have no choice but to listen to my parents and chose my family because they are my #1 priority. In both of my two identities my name remains the same, my parents, my friends, and my teachers (other than Grow, he calls me Cannon) all call me Rachel This is a reason why I believe my name does not define me as much as my personality does.

At least Urban Dictionary knows the real me. "Rachel: A smart, sassy, and sexy young woman who knows things from fashion to film to literature, from Manolo Blanks to Mahatma Gandhi."

*Yes it is Rachel, NOT Rachael. Yes, Cannon with 2 N's like the gun.